Surrender or be Conquered?

I recently asked my little boy, if he wanted to be conquered or to surrender to me. Here is his response.

Mommy asked me to write about whether i would rather surrender or be conquered? And why?

I believe the answer is a combination of the two, as there must be some connection and willingness to surrender ones freedom in the first place.  Without that connection and desire to be owned, the whole process of ownership and submission can come off as a game making the entire act a joke and a total turn off.

My surrendering to Mommy did not start as total surrender but rather began with a desire to serve and submit to Her.  I immediately felt something and knew that She was the Domme I had to kneel before. And commit myself to.

Little by little Mommy, sensing and feeling my devotion, started to take control and kept whittling away at me, until She conquered me and got my total devotion and complete submission.

The fact that it was a gradual power exchange made it all the more real and natural, it was something that I HAD to do, no rather needed to do.  I am now at the point where I am begging Her to take more and more control.  In a sense my surrendering led to my being conquered.

Had I not had a willingness to surrender to Her, I do not know if I would have been able to be conquered by Her.

I have willingly turned over two credit cards and my banking information, as well as placed Her collar in the form of a metal cock ring around what is now Her cock.

So my being conquered started with a willingness to surrender and has grown into something so special and real that I can’t imagine my life without Her.

This is the same little boy I've registered as mine. The same little boy who now wears a cock ring 24/7 to represent his submission and slavery to me. The same boy that offers himself willingly and freely to me. We live very far from one another. There are no real ties holding us together - yet, we remain one. He is the first I've ever trusted with more than my real name, but my location, my family - he is the first of many. The first I've experienced bondage with - he wrapped himself nicely like a present for me.

I hope to discover many firsts with this sweet little slut. It's such a deep power exchange when the sub trusts fully. 

He was at work when the cock ring arrived.

I told him to go to the bathroom and put it on.

I love a good boy that listens.

EXTERMINATE! Geek randomness is my life.

My present - One of the most erotic orgasms I've seen from a boy yet.

Always sunny in Florida..

Kiss my feet...

Keep reading, more to come on Fuzzy in the next post. He's also been a good little boy.

-Goddess Lotus

Myfitnesspal

If you want to keep up to date with my fitness goals, you can download the app myfitnesspal and search for the username GoddessLotus.

I look forward to seeing any boys or Ladies that are also trying to keep up with their fitness goals for this year.

If you would like to offer a gift for future workout gear, you may do so by sending an American amazon.com giftcard to the email kamala_nfe@yahoo.com


-Goddess Lotus

4-2-15 (....Good things comes to those...)

Good morning, Ladies and worms. I just finished a 3 and half mile walk and now settling for some homework.

I recently had a boy approach me, and ask if he could serve me. My blog is the only place were my email and instant messenger services are listed. That means - I expect you to at least read through some of the previous blogs. It's disrespectful not to, and it shows a lack of effort on your part. Why contact me and ask me for my time, when you havent even taken the time to educate yourself on my needs and expectations?


I'm a real person. I dont pretend to be a hard bitch, leather clad, dominatrix. That's not my style. I'm down to earth, geeky, and I tend to care for my property. I'm a loving domme, with a penchant for making my property suffer via chastity.

I also ramble and skip subjects and some how completely miss the point of everything when I post a new blog entry.

:P

In other words, what you see is what you get with me. I currently own two boys, fuzzy and little boy. I'm building a power exchange that will last a life time. Not a week, or a month or two, not even a year or two.

I want to own a man for life. I want to be his solace and happiness. I am engaged, so married men do not hinder me.

I dont want to be your wife, sister, or daughter. I'm your owner, or in lil boy's case, his Mommy. :P <3
Fuzzy has been amazing. He has attempted to try and keep more in contact, and communication open. The more we chat, the more exciting and fun ideas I can come up with to humiliate and tease him further.

Lil boy - He helped me get some work out fear and proper shoes for my walking. Not only that, but almost every time he can, he encourages me to keep moving forward with my goals. <3

Workout gear!

Local lake - Great spot for a Goddess to walk and free her mind

I am starting to love sunglasses. Like LOVE them.

Dont you wish you where here with me?

Lick, suckle, and kiss.... 

What comes to your mind when you see me?

I had a rough couple of weeks, but I am happy to have the boys in my life that love me. I love them. I want to get more active with my images and postings here. Share my happiness with the world!

-Goddess Lotus

End of March - Addicted

So much has happened this month.

Doofus decided to leave.

I am an online Domme. I youre a frequent reader of my blog life, then you'll know I'm no stranger to a sub walking away. It's almost like the unspoken rule of online domination, they always leave.

It hurt, and I mourned the loss of a connection I put my all into.

Then I pulled on my panties like a big girl, and began to focus on the white slave's that still remain loyal.

Fuzzy's life situation has changed, which limits his privacy nowadays. I've given him the out, because the constant communication we had in the beginning has now dwindled to a thing of the past.

He refused. He chose me. Said he loved being my property - and that he'd rather work for what we have. That is what I seek. A deep rooted connection and a need for me in his life. Thank you for being mine fuzzy. You fill apart of me, and I hope I do the same for you. Even though we spend less time together, I know what we share is real. That feeling helpless and weak comes naturally to you in my presence.

There's my new boy. Well, he is no longer new. He is.. a missing puzzle piece in my life. From the second day we met, we've been able to sit and chat for hours. I think thats what most online Dommes miss and most subs dont quite understand - communication. Without being able to talk to one another, what do you have left? Sex? Money? His nickname is my little boy.

Little boy and I chat every day. With him, I explore the Mommy Domme elements and he serves as my little boy. It is similar to the Daddy Dom and babygirl elements if you are familiar with that. He is twice my age. He is an older white, business man - and he loves to beg a young, black woman...for any privilege I allow. Our dynamic is new, growing, and shaping into something beautiful. He revels in every privilege of pleasure I allow.. Even touching himself at work for my pleasure. Becoming a naughty, dirty, little bitch while his coworkers are ignorant of his true self.

He even enjoys being DENIED - so that I can have what I want. <3

I will post more.. on Fuzzy and little boy. I will start to do journals with my boys, and will post what they write here for all to see.

Now onto me! I've lost 11 lbs, and midterms are over! Woohoo!! I'm sexy. Smart. Yadda.. Yadda. Nothing has really changed with me - I suppose my understanding of my submissives needs and desires.

I'm starting to ramble on and on. Basically - I'm happy. Happier than I've ever been. It's not about money or gifts. Its not about sex and orgasms. It's about commitment, honesty, loyalty and most of all? Trust. My current boys offer all of that to me and more. I want to break them, own them, reduce grown men into whimpering little boys dependent on me. 

My fiance is amazing - but he isnt my bitch. I crave dominance over a man. Fuzzy and little boy, you give me what I need. 

I am addicted to power and control.

-Goddess Lotus

Hmmm

I couldve sworn I made a post since March 5th. I have no idea what the fuck happened to it.

March 2015 - Mid Terms

Midterms suck.

That is all. Studying hard.


I've been having a wonderful new year. My 3 subs are serving me well. There's something about controlling someone, not just their actions. But controlling their thoughts and emotions.. That completes me.

My white boy, the new boy. He is amazing. He understands me for me and how goofy I can be, yet sensual, and dominating. I love not having to pretend to be anything Im not.

Fuzzy is loyal and deeply sensual. I havent spent much time with him due to my mid terms, and work, and marital issues. But life will always come first - then ME.

Doofus. I almost let him go, simply because he seem uninterested. I have no issues admitting that I crave attention. I love it, being the center of your world. And when our constant communication almost shrivels up and dies, I get worried. Though, luckily for him? He broke down..expressed his feelings, and we moved forward.

I have a Goddess complex, where I want to be important, and matter to my submissives. I want to guide, train, and love my property. I seek deep, unyielding, and dark new depths. I want long term and a complete power exchange.

So far? I think I've hit the jack pot.

School is going great. I will admit, February I ate out often. This month, I sticking to two times a week. I am working out and sticking to my goals.

I love my submissives. I love myself. I ask that anyone reading this, take a chance. Approach that Domme youre afraid of, or just do something you never wouldve thought you could do.

I love being a Domme. I love controlling white men. I love being superior and amazing.

Smile and live life.

-Goddess Lotus

XoXo

For some reason, I thought I had made a post in February. So much has happened these last few weeks. School is going great and so is my fitness plan. I am sticking to my goals, and hopefully will see progress in the future. That and my ass looks great in my work out pants!

I've been spoiled and worshiped by my 3 slaves. Doofus is still around, and so is fuzzy wuzzy. I met my newest pet within secondlife and it blossomed naturally and easily into an ownership. He has offered himself to me willingly and openly, and within his submission we both will grow. Talking to my little white boy is one of the high lights of my day, to any of them really. <3

I dont pretend to be anyone else, or some strict leather domme, or some evil cruel mistress. I'm a geek, a preschool teacher, and I love to cook! The wanting to corrupt, tease, and fuck you senseless part of me is only a small part.

I love when I meet a submissive and we simply click; he gets me and I get him. I believe that is what I found within my newest white boy. I do not have a nickname for him, besides old man. Each white slave that approaches me offers me something different in our female led relationship.. Doofus offers me complete control. Fuzzy wuzzy is one sexual beast, chastity keeping him dripping and horny enough to fuck walls... And now, my newest pet. He gives me that constant communication, all day long.. that urge, that desire to tie him tightly, bound and gagged.. (possible through the medium in which we met.)

What I'm trying to say is that I am blessed. Those of you who have continually read my blog know Mina, Steff, Lion.. and so many others that have come into my life and left. Its sad to lose a sub, after bonding and creating a D/s relationship.. it hurts. It's extremely difficult to have what I want through online.

I want deep, dark, sticky.. I want to become an addiction for you, I want to be the reason your cock hardens.. and the ache in your balls for not being allowed to cum. I want to chat all day, when possible, hear about your ups and downs. I want a friendship and your submission. I want your devotion and your loyalty. I want to be your Goddess. Your owner. I want complete control.. or as much as possible over your life.

I ramble - often, and I could go on and on. It's Valentine's day tomorrow. My pets have all given generously - and most importantly? It was their choice. Thank you, mine for all that you have done to make my life better. I certainly hope I brighten your days just as you do mine,

If you would like to offer a valentine gift, you may do so via an American Amazon giftcard to the email kamala_nfe@yahoo.com

Gifting is a power exchange, it is a decision from the sub to offer a way to make my life better. There are those that do not agree, and to each their own. I seek subs that have taken the time to read and get to know me, and understand me - and most all want to serve me.

Have a good one.

-Goddess Lotus
xoxo